YES ,YOU HAVE HEARD OF IT, ALL YOU SELF CONFESSED MASTERBATERS OUT THERE.
LAST NIGHT I WAS ON THE PHONE TO A GIRL I MET ON HOLS,SHE WAS SAT WITH HER HUBBY IN THE HOTEL AND WE WERE SURROUNDED BY THE VARICOUS VAIN CLUB. BASICALLY A LOAD OF 50 SOMETHINGS SINGING THE FIELDS OF ATHERIE. WHEN ID HAD ...
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FOGGY DREW THE BARBER.
FOGGY HAD NEITHER A WIFE NOR SIBLINGS.HE WAS A SON OF A FARMER IN THE BACK ARSE OF NOWWHERE IN A LITTLE TOWN CALLED CORDUFF IN THE WEST OF IRELAND.NOW FOGGY WAS A SHEEP FARMER IN HIS YOUNGER DAYS, BUT WAS ABLE TO BUY LAND DOWN ...
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LATELY IM CONSTANTLY DREAMING OF LOOKING FOR CLOTHES. THE PROBLEM IS IM LOOKING ON THE RAILS, FINDING A DRESS , BUT HAVING TO GO HOME AND REMEMBERING I NEED SOMETHING ELSE, SO BACK TO THE SHOP I GO. I SPEND THE WHOLE DREAM SEARCHING AND FORGETTING SOMETHING.WHEN I FINALLY FIND THE OUTFIT I WAKE UP ...
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I am fed up to the back teeth of working with the gypsys, my talents are wasted, as it is a thankless job, and certainly not for the faint hearted, im begining to feel the pressure, im put under.Now my boss has decided im to teach the boys, WHAT! how the bejesus am i gonna teach these little fecke...
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When you are single is there a time when you have had enough of dating, shagging around and basically no one in your life to share things with. ?If you ever felt like you met the one and he she hasnt called. Or they let you down, maybe they have cheated and youve become bitter towards the opposi...
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Here i was on another girly weekend away.With butterflies in the stomach.A four day trip watching a pal of mine in the british final come dancing.Held in the winter gardens in blackpool north west England.
Well on the friday i travelled to manchester to meet up with a pal of mine.Three sheets t...
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Living in a differant country of my own, i have lived in Ireland for ten years now, at first the thought on the irish people were very friendly,dont get me wrong i have some good clients and pals, but im talking about the retail buisness.
Im not known for being subtle, or having a meek and mild ...
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So here iam again, wondering what to right about when i thought to myself, well where have i been, what have i been doing. Well not that anyones interested but iv been detoxing the brain.How you might ask. I bought myself 2 really good books on crime and iv been in the sack very early, once you s...
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BEAUTIFUL WOMEN
A little boy asked his mother,"Why are you always crying?"
Because "im a woman" she told him
"I dont understand' he said
His mum just hugged him and said"and you never will"
Later the little boy asked his father"Why does mother seem to cry for no reason"
"All women ...
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As it was ladys day on saturday, a friend of mine rounded up a table for 10 at the Marriot hotel, for a fun day to help terminally ill childrens make a wish come true.
It was an early start at 12.30 am ,the dress was smart casual, and the days events were, a champers reception and 250 women chat...
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How do you like your eggs in a morning?pesonally i did prefer a taxi, forget the eggs, i had oats last night, tar very muchas. Dating i never really did, although i did have only 3 long relationships, in my teens to the mid twentys. I was always in the habit of going out looking for a fumb...
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IT WAS THREE YEARS OF PURE SLOG, THE FACT THAT THE LIFELONG DREAM I WAS ABOUT TO AMBARK ON WAS IN THE PIPELINE IT WAS NEAR..COMPLETION. THEN THE NEWS CAME BY TELEPHONE MY FATHER HAD DIED, SHOCK WASNT IN IT.WHAT COULD I DO ,HE HAD NO ONE BUT ME. I LEFT FOR ENGLAND AND STARTED THE PROCESS OF THE...
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IT WAS SNOWING AND WE WERE ON A MISSION TO DO A LITTLE SHEFAN ( ski drive) we had gone to visit a pal of ours who shacked up with an austrian. you see the austrians are so organised and frown upon us mere disorganised brits. The funny thing was when we arrived to stay in coners one bed flat apa...
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I was pottering round the house cleaning the other day when i was remernising about my wild days before i settled for normality. I ll take you back to the 80 s when smiley acid t. shirts were all the rage with ripped jeans and of course i did look like Yazz the singer with a bleached skinhead....
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YES ,YOU HAVE HEARD OF IT, ALL YOU SELF CONFESSED MASTERBATERS OUT THERE.
LAST NIGHT I WAS ON THE PHONE TO A GIRL I MET ON HOLS,SHE WAS SAT WITH HER HUBBY IN THE HOTEL AND WE WERE SURROUNDED BY THE VARICOUS VAIN CLUB. BASICALLY A LOAD OF 50 SOMETHINGS SINGING THE FIELDS OF ATHERIE. WHEN ID HAD A FEW BEVVIES I DECIDED TO AQUAINT MYSELF WITH THE SAID COUPLE. IT TURNED OUT THAT MY FRIEND GILL HAD THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS ME AND WE WERE SO SIMIULAR .
HENCE THE FRIENDSHIP, AND SO SHE PHONED ME LAST NIGHT TO TELL ME SHE HAD MADE THE DECISION TO LEAVE THE HUSBAND. WHEN I ASKED WHAT WENT WRONG SHE SAID, HE NEVER WANTS ANY SEX, AND THAT SHE WAS FED UP OF CRYING HERSELF TO SLEEP THINKING SOMETHING WAS WRONG WITH HER. SO SHE HAS INVESTED IN THE RAMPENT RABBITT.
ITS FUCKING AMAZING AS SHE WENT ON TO TELL ME SHES KNICKING BATTERIES OUT OF THE REMOTE AND THE CLOCK ,SHE DECIDED TO INVEST IN SOME NEW EVER READYS AND THAT SHE NEARLY FELL OFF THE BED WITH THE CLIMAX.ONLY TO GIVE HERSELF CYCSTIS, THATS SHE PULLING HERSLF RAGGID. WELL I WAS IN TUCKS LAUGHING AT THE MAD WHORE.
THEN SHE PROCEDED TO TELL ME THAT SHE HATES HER VAGINA AND THAT SHE WENT FOR A TALK WITH A PLASTIC SURGAN.WHEN THE LADY ASKED HER WHAT SIZE BOOBS SHE INTENDED TO HAVE ,MY PAL EXEEDED TO TELL HER THAT HER TITS WERE JUST FINE AND THAT SHE ACTUALLY WANTED A DESIGNER VAGINA, THE LADY REFERED HER TO SOMEONE ELSE. WHEN I SAID TO HER WHAT IS WRONG WITH IT SHE SAID, THAT IT JUST WASNT NORMAL THAT HER LIPS WERE LONGER THAN A SPANIELS EARS AND SHE ASKED 2 OF HER OTHER FRIEND COULD SHE HAVE A GAWP AT THEIRS AND SHE REALISED ONLY ANOTHER FRIEND WIITH THE SAME PROBLEM, AND THEY ALL ADMITTED THAT HERS WAS RATHER ODD LOOKING.
I SAID THAT THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO MAKE IT LOOK MORE PLUMP, THAT THE LANDING STRIP IS A NO NO ,AS IT MAKES IT LOOK EVEN LONGER ,AND TO SHAPE IT WITH A SHORT TRIANGLE TO GIVE IT FULLNESS. ANY WAY SHE S HAVING IT DONE IT COSTS AROUND 4 GRAND, BUT SHE HAS TO STAY WITH THE HUBBY IN ORDER TO SAVE UP.
ANOTHER THING SHE HAD ONLY LAST WEEK WAS THE BOTOX OVER THE EYEBROW. SHE SAID THERE WAS TOO MUCH PUMPED INTO ONE AND NOW SHE LOOKS LIKE POPEYE OVER THAT EYE, AND ONE EYEBROW IN QUESTION LOOKS PERMANANTLY BEWILDERED.
I WOULDNT MIND IF SHE LOOKED CRAP BUT SHES A SIX FOOT IRISH STUNNER WITH A BODY AND A FACE TO DIE FOR IF ONLY I LOOKED AS GOOD. THERE IS ONE THING I WOULDNT DO AND THATS CUT MY LIPS OFF DOWNSTAIRS HAVE BOTOX AND A PAIR OF PLASTIC FOOTBALLS STUCK ON MY CHEST GOD LOVE HER, LIKE I SAID TO HER ARE YOU SURE YOURE NOT ONE OF THESE PEOPLE WHO THINK
THEY ARE DISFIGUERED WHEN SHE LOOKS IN THE MIRROR. DEFINATLY NOT SHE SAID ,BUT WHEN ONE RUDE BASTARD OF A GUY ASKED HER , WAS HER JEANS HUNGRY, SHE REPLIED NO WHAT DO YOU MEAN, HE REPLIED WITH WELL THEY ARE EATING AWAY AT YOUR FANNY. I SUPPOSE THAT WAS THE DECIDER, BUT OF COURSE IF HED OF ASKED ME ID OF SAID NO HONEY ITS WAITING TO CHEW YOUR F....G COCK OFF HA HA HAVE YOU EVER CONCIDERED A DESIGNER VAGINA ?
FOGGY DREW THE BARBER.
FOGGY HAD NEITHER A WIFE NOR SIBLINGS.HE WAS A SON OF A FARMER IN THE BACK ARSE OF NOWWHERE IN A LITTLE TOWN CALLED CORDUFF IN THE WEST OF IRELAND.NOW FOGGY WAS A SHEEP FARMER IN HIS YOUNGER DAYS, BUT WAS ABLE TO BUY LAND DOWN THE ROAD, IT WAS AN OLD USED PUBLIC TOILET, SO HE PUT IN AN OFFER AND DECIDED TO TURN IT INTO A BARBERS SHOP. SINCE LEAVING THE FARM AGED 20, HE TRAINED WITH THE LOCAL BARBER MR.MURPHY AND SO BECAME A DAB HAND AT CUTTING HAIR.
HE WAS PROUD OF HIS GARDEN,AS IT WAS AN ATTRACTION TO THE LOCALS,AND TOURISTS.HIS FAVORITE PASTIME WAS CAREFULLY TRIMMING AND STYLING THE HEDGES,AND THE BUXUS TREES INTO SOMETHING FROM THE WIZARD OF OZ. HE HAD DOG SHAPED ONES,CATS ,DUCKS,DONKEYS, AND HIS LATEST INVENTION WAS A MARVELOUS SEA LION BALANCING A BALL ON ITS NOSE.
FOGGYS MIND WAS DISINTERGRATING FAST. HE HAD BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH ALSHIEMERS.HE WAS FOND OF THE OLD JAMESONS WHISKY. HE WAS ALSO OBSESSED WITH SCISSORS. HE HAD THEM IN THE KITCHEN, IN THE GARDEN, IN THE LIVING ROOM, IN THE BATHROOM, JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE BUT THE BARBERS BECAUSE HE WAS ALWAYS FORGETTING TO TAKE THEM WITH HIM. THE LOCAL CHEMIST HAD COPPED ONTO HIS FORGETFULLNESS AND SO ORDERED SCISSORS BY THE BUCKET LOAD, AS THEY KNEW EVERY DAY HE WOULD BE IN BUYING A PAIR.
ONE MORNING HE AWOKE AND GOT DRESSED,IN HIS BLACK TROUSERS WITH BRACES, HIS VEST ,HIS CHRISTMAS JUMPER AND OF COURSE HIS STEEL TOE CAPPED BOOTS.
: good morning minnie; HE SAID TO HIS CAT, IS IT PORRIDGE THIS HERE MORN?( after breakfast he pours himself a whisky, washes his glass wipes it and puts it away)THEN FOGGY POURS HIMSELF A WHISKY WASHES HIS GLASS AND PUTS IT AWAY.HE GOES TO THE BATHROOM TO TRIM HIS NAZEL HAIR, GOES DOWNSTAIRS POURS HIMSELF A WHISKY WASHES HIS GLASS THEN PUTS IT AWAY. HE THEN REALISES TIME HAS FLOWN AND IT IS TIME FOR WORK.OFF HE GOES IN HIS LAND ROVER TO THE BARBERS. HE OPENS UP THE SHOP AND LOOKS FOR THE SCISSORS, AGAIN NO SCISSORS, SO HE LOCKS UP AND WALKS OVER TO THE CHEMIST.
THE CLOCK IN THE BARBERS HAS BEEN STUCK ON 5 OCLOCK FOR YEARS NOW, STILL WITH THE SCISSORS IN HIS POCKET , HE OPENS UP AGAIN ,ONLY TO LOOK AT THE CLOCK ,HE THINKS IT IS CLOSING TIME(bearing in mind he s only just opened) SO HE DRIVES HOME FEEDS MINNIE AND YES YOU GUESSED IT POURS HIMSELF A WHISKY WASHES HIS GLASS AND PUTS IT AWAY.
THE LOCALNEWSPAPER WERE DOING A FEATURE ON THE LOCAL SHOPS IN THE AREA, FOGGY WAS GETTING BAD REVIEWS, HE READ THE ARTICLE AND WAS OUTRAGED AND HURT BY THE LOCALS REVIEWS HE WAS GETTING FROM THE BY STANDERS. 
h yes that foggy one his barbers has been closed for years now mister
said one fella)
:That barbers is falling down its a bloody eye sore: said another local.STEAM WAS COMING OUT OF FOGGYS EARS, HE WAS SO ANNOYED AND SO HE DECIDED TO TAKE A TRIP DOWN TO THE EVENING GAZETTE TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT.OFF HE LEFT IN HIS LANDROVER, OPENED UP THE BARBERS , CLOSED THE BARBERS, WALKED OVER TO THE CHEMIST, BOUGHT SOME SCISSORS, DROVE HOME FED MINNIE POURED HIMSELF A WHISKY, WASHED HIS GLASS AND PUT IT AWAY.
IT WAS JUST ANOTHER TYPICAL DAY IN FOOGYS MIND THE END.
LATELY IM CONSTANTLY DREAMING OF LOOKING FOR CLOTHES. THE PROBLEM IS IM LOOKING ON THE RAILS, FINDING A DRESS , BUT HAVING TO GO HOME AND REMEMBERING I NEED SOMETHING ELSE, SO BACK TO THE SHOP I GO. I SPEND THE WHOLE DREAM SEARCHING AND FORGETTING SOMETHING.WHEN I FINALLY FIND THE OUTFIT I WAKE UP AND NEVER GET TO SEE WHAT I LOOK LIKE, IN THE ATTIRE.
WHATS IT ALL ABOUT, ITS REACURRING AND DOING MY FRIGGIN HEAD IN NOW.IT MUST MEAN SOMETHING. THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT MY DREAMING THAT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.THEY ARE VIVID IN COLOUR AND I ALWAYS REMEMBER THEM, FIGHTING IN A DREAM IS ANOTHER ONE,LIKE THE SAME DREAM I WAS FIGHTING WITH A TRAVELLER GIRL I TEACH, BUT MY BLOWS WERE NOT GETTING ANYWHERE EVEN THOUGH I WAS GETTING THE BETTER OF HER.
I USED TO HAVE PHYCIC DREAMS THAT MEANT THINGS TO ME I JUST HAD TO PUT THE PUZZLE TOGETHER AND IT WOULD MAKE SENSE. LIKE DREAMING OF FINDING A RING MY GRANDMOTHER LEFT ME. I HAD ALREADY SEARCHED THE HOUSE ,THE DREAM TOLD ME TO LOOK ON THE SHELF IN THE BEDROOM ,AND LOW AND BEHOLD IT WAS THERE.
WHEN WE DREAM OF A LOVED ONE AND THEY COME TO SEE YOU IN A DREAM, IT IS SUCH AN UPLIFTING EXPERIANCE WHEN YOU WAKE. THEY ARE LOOKING AFTER US AND LETTING US KNOW THEY ARE AROUND. RATHER THAN COMING IN THE ROOM AND PRESENTING THEMSELVES TO US. WHICH CAN BE FRIGHTENING IN ITSELF.
IF THERE IS A DREAM EXPERT ON ORBLE ,CAN YOU EXPLAIN THE NEED TO SHOP AND NOT GET THE FINAL OUTFIT TOGETHER,THE DILLY DALLYING AROUND ONLY TO WAKE WITHOUT SEEING THE FINAL RESULT, WHATS THAT ALL ABOUT THEN?
TO ALL THOSE WHO THINK OF OUR FAMILY ON THE OTHER SIDE, REMEMBER WHEN WE THINK OF THEM IN THOUGHT AND ASK IF THEY ARE OK IN OUR MINDS,YOU OFTEN THINK THAT IF AN ANSWER COMES IN OUR HEAD IT IS YOURSELF TALKING TO YOU. WRONG A THOUGHT IS A LIVING THING, AND IT CAN BE HEARD , ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS LISTEN AND BE HEARD..AND WAIT FOR THE ANSWER. GOOD DAY YALL!
I am fed up to the back teeth of working with the gypsys, my talents are wasted, as it is a thankless job, and certainly not for the faint hearted, im begining to feel the pressure, im put under.Now my boss has decided im to teach the boys, WHAT! how the bejesus am i gonna teach these little feckers hair and beauty when they think making a cup of tea is sissyish.
Although the lads do like me and i get on well with them all , they are so unpradictable. Last week it was lovely and sunny and so 3 teachers decided we would go for a walk.So down the canal we went, not being happy sitting near the water they asked if they could go to the shopping centre, so off we went into the mall, to get frog marched out off 2 bouncers for the simple reason 2 traveller boys were taking the mickey out of everyone in their.
BANNED again. So walking back it kicked off with two boys both bare knuckle fighting with there shirts off along the canal, blood eveywhere .A male teacher tried to split them up and got a box in the face for doing so.
Last thursday we took them out bowling, everything was going swell when the boys threw down some litter on the ground,( they think this is normal) so the manager grabbed hold of one of the more aggresive boy and told him he was banned, it was quite a showing up actually, as it looks like we have no controll most of the time we have. And so we told the aggressive boy to wait outside untill we were ready.Next of all a woman marched up to me and shouted are you supposed to be monitering these two boys who are verbally attacking my boss outside she was a right bossy cow and so i asked her that her boss had grabbed one of the boys and that is not right in itself , and so when i went to look outside they were shouting and the man had his finger in the boys face screaming at them.I diffused the situation and the story is we are banned from there also now.
I really am at a standstill ,i have a salon outside of the travellers, i only work with the gypos 1 and a half days per week and the pay is 600 euro for those days the money has me big time I listened to them talking about claiming false doles and getting paid for the centre in which i teach .They have never worked and they are driving brand new Humma vans and 08 cars. I was thinking about leaving as the stress levels in there are up to ninty , i need a new path to go down but what i do not know.I just wish a job would fly round the corner and pick me up with it that im going to love. I would love some television work but with Ireland only having two channels im doomed to work overhere, i might apply for living t v, i suppose i could fly at this moment in time im stuck in a rut and my creative side is going down the swanny, if there is anyone out there looking for a makeover expert in a television company im ur woman . goodbye for now. fed up linz/
When you are single is there a time when you have had enough of dating, shagging around and basically no one in your life to share things with. ?If you ever felt like you met the one and he /she hasnt called. Or they let you down, maybe they have cheated and youve become bitter towards the opposite sex. Whatever about it though , being single is bloody great if you arnt looking for the lover of your dreams, maybe you have been married and want some fun with no strings attached, but why do we want what others have?
And so when we elope, it feels good for a while although you wouldnt want to be with anyone else(i dont think) but a slight peev of envy comes to mind when the single pals are getting into funny scrapes of sex drugs and rock and roley poley with strangers.
A divorced friend of mine had a fun time recently when she had a night out.She recalls walking into a bar and looking like a honey pot to the men in there.Aplonker of a fella was after her but he was hogging the karioki. Any way a hot fit bastard caught her eye, as she was outside smoking he came to join her for a smoke, but the karioki dude was singing outside the bar i just called to say i love you he was spoiling the moment.Time passed, before she took off with the 28 year old, her words were 
he felt like a high class hooker:.
As soon as they entered his house they were at it all over , when it came to sleep time she said he had mirrored wardrobes, whilst he was trying to get his head down, she kept sitting up in front of the mirror and powdering her nose to hide the thred veins in the morning, she also asked him rather off it :are you my boyfriend:? she later said :i must of looked like a bunny boiler.In the morning he looked so sexy in a hoody a pair of boxers and a pair of trainers.he was snogging her for a while when he said he had to go to football and to collect the nets, she hasnt hard off him since.
And so im asking all the singles out there and all the married ones do you ever wish you were single or married, there is also the affair, would you go there at all? They say a man buys three diamonds in his life, one for the wife one for the mistress, and one for the wife when she finds out about the mistress. So peeps ill leave it there, happy weekend folks and remember to use the condoms if your single you wouldnt want to be getting the clap now would you .he he x
Here i was on another girly weekend away.With butterflies in the stomach.A four day trip watching a pal of mine in the british final come dancing.Held in the winter gardens in blackpool north west England.
Well on the friday i travelled to manchester to meet up with a pal of mine.Three sheets to the wind after finding 60 quid which i had spent drinking half of it away(start as i mean to go on).So here i arrived pissed out of my tree and in great form.So i went to stay at my pals house where the ex no hoper of a husband of my pal sarah was slobbing on the sofa.He has a habit of sniffing white powder up his nostals and so again has no job or living accomodation.Get me to the pub i thought, which we did.We ordered a bottle of wine and drank two glasses, we decided to go to another pub and so like two knackers tried to pour our wine back into the bottle and sneaked out with it hidden under the coat.
Arrived at the bulls head, and sitting on a stool was another no hoper of an ex, belonging to my pal , he was perched on a stool with his new half his age lover. You see my friend was due to marry this guy and the bastard wouldnt get out of bed the morning they were supposed to be heading off to spain to be married.This sent my pal into extreme oblivion, and so she knocked back a brandy and a vodka and red bull, she cant remember coming home that night, and so pissed off to bed and left me downstairs with the kids.THANKS MATE.
Trying to sleep in another bed was hurrendous ,especially with a rake of booze in you.And so i awoke early at around four in the morning, tossing and turning.Anyway after getting ready off we drove to not so sunny blackpool. We were staying with the dancers in a B B, which was totally pre historic but clean.We headed off to the fairground and ate seafood and had yes you guessed some more booze.That night we headed off into the town , for a boogy, arriving back late for more shicker. My friend pissed off to bed again with chicken and chips which i scoffed when entering the time warp of a room.
The next day was the dancing finals, latin which my old school friend tracey was in.Again awake at 6 am Tracey came in our room for the hair makeover, the dread of doing marcel waves and trying to glue on a hundred diamonds was killing me.The shakes were unbelievable.My pal sarah was in the bed ,we had borrowed a bar stool and placed it in front of the wobbly wardrobe in which there was a mirror.I laid out my tools all of 3 items a comb , gel and a few diamonds.We thought this hilarious, as Tracey thought id be well prepared and so scrambled around for more items to place on the bed, to look well prepared for Traceys entrance, laughing all the while.
She sat in front of the mirror and i hadnt a clue what i was doing , and so Sarah burried her head under the covers pissing herself as i tried to act normal and in control.The sweat was pouring off me .The hardest thing was the friggin diamonds. i created marcels on a zig zag partin, and brought a strand of hair across the fore head to create a head band and stuck these f ers on.We had a toothbrush holder upside down with glue on it and a ear bud without the fluff on, at one time all three of us were in tucks of laughter with the hand shakes of myself and eventually i pulled it off.
THE COMPETITION BEGAN, again another bar was right behind our chairs,and so another heavy session, it was a brill atmosphere and my friend came 7 th out of 60 dancers.After the show we went to a fab restraunt, and ate the place out.We headed back to the hammer house of horrors and got into our p j .i had the best sleep ever.I headed home and caught the flight back,i looked ok, but iv been in bed for seven o clock for the last 3 days catching up, so its back to monotiny in not so sunny ireland and i bloody fed up again. good bye peeps.
Living in a differant country of my own, i have lived in Ireland for ten years now, at first the thought on the irish people were very friendly,dont get me wrong i have some good clients and pals, but im talking about the retail buisness.
Im not known for being subtle, or having a meek and mild nature.But i do know how to treat people well ,and my communication skills are fucking good.Im just going to decribe the kinda things im talking about.
Out shopping for clothes, loaded down with unwanted stuff, im out of the changing rooms and theres a numpty of a kid stood there .Her job is to take the clothes and to help you put them on the hangers,and to take them off you.Oh no not in this fuckin country.She saw me struggling right next to me she stood, loaded with clothes and she stood and she stood , untill i was going to rip the kids head off.I placed them back on the hangers and passed them to her and said THANK YOU TO HER IN AN AGGRESIVE MANNER.she still didnt get the drift,silly cow.
Again in the shopping centre eating a sandwich and a young girl gets sick right next to me .I jumped up as she was turning green and asked her if she was ok.Everyone just looking blanc at me and this kid.I went to get help from the pakistani staff, and a irish girl in charge said she was going on her break.Now im in an eatery here and there is ten tone of vomit on the floor.Fifteen mins had passed and still no fucker came.Im off the food by this time and the kid has legged it.Eventually a dope of an assitstant manager comes along and threw some sawdust down.I turned around and a paki caught my eye ,he was cleaning some cups to put out, he was prufusely sweating dolly apples on the forehead and the dirty bastards, wiping his head with the tea trowel in which he was wiping the cups.eeeewwwwwwwww never again will i eat there.
Another time im in Dublin city and i was stood at a rather large long bar waiting,for a drink and to be served.When head bar maid probably in charge of the 14 or so staff came waltzing up right in front of me, looking at the till.Her back was to me and it was subtle enough and fast, but not fast enough for the big dog ( me ) to notice this.She looked around and opened the till and nicked 50 quid slid it in her pocket and turned around to me.I gave her the look of i know what your up to misses ,but she was in ablivian to my look as her adrenalin must of been pumping. At the airport some weeks ago i witnessed the same from 2 polish girls serving behind a sandwich bar.One was counting a wad of fiftys and the other polish girl was looking around before pulling out her own purse from her pocket.She shiftely pulled out a fifty and swapped it in the taking from the till i suppose it could of been a fake 50 note.The big dog was watching and so a few wines in me i asked the assistant manager to tell his boss what those cheeky little poles were up too.
And finally the moral of this blog is.For all you peeps in retail HAVE SOME F.....G cop on will ya.AND FOR ALL THE LITTLE CHEATERS OUT THERE some nosey bastard out there like myself is watching your every move.I should of been a detective but im far too nice for that plus i havnt got a large cranium for that.Did you ever notice a copper on the telly giving an interview.They either have beady bore a hole in your head eyes.Or a massive tefel head.Or they look like they need a right good rodgering, i bet most detective men cant make any noises whilst having sex They are too poised and cool for noises, plus they are used to wanking in the mothers house secretly under the covers and so they bred the no noise system themselves.But arent they supposed to be kinky little fuckers?into being dominated in there gimp outfits and placed in a cot with a nappy on as an adult baby.Personally id love to beat the bejesus out of a copper. with the biggest whip youve evr seen oh and id make him lick my boots, full of dog turd. but hey thats another bullshite blog...no offence to the t fal cops out ther youre doing a great job.sometimes......bye bye for now
So here iam again, wondering what to right about when i thought to myself, well where have i been, what have i been doing. Well not that anyones interested but iv been detoxing the brain.How you might ask. I bought myself 2 really good books on crime and iv been in the sack very early, once you start to read the eylids get heavy and boom your asleep by 9. 30 pm.Bloody boring you may add, well actually im off the gargle that being the wine and beer.
The weather is shite and ive been wrapped up in bed like an old granny with bed socks on. I know how sexy can one get ,but the weather really is baltic.Im prepping the skin also for when the sun shines and my feathers are shiney and new to show the whole world just how gorgeous iam. The neighbours are even asking him indoors is linzi ok .He keeps telling every one im fucking depressed. Thats his interpretation of the latest events.Do men really understand us? im not depressed well i was for 7 days of the month but hey thats normal hubby , i tend to hibernate like this and my friends miss my candid calls back home, my drinking buddy next door really misses me, my hubby misses my slapstick, or rather his little bit of slapstick, my mother misses her chats on the blower.
The thing is also, my time teaching the travellers are coming to an end, the money is phenominal, thats why im still there, but the reason i need space is that iv got another buisness idea ,which ive had for over twenty years now in the back of my mind now its coming to the front and i cant get rid of it.The mind is taking over and filling my head with buzzing ideas.Only this time im very slow to jump in, normally i would, im just nuturing the full idea of a hairdressing school.Most of my clients think its a winner with me. I have found a buisness partner,only just a thought i said to her, she isnt in the buisness ,but is an accountant, for a corperate company. i wont bore you with the details, but its taking over.
As life is passing me by, i have always lived through my career, the family have suffered slightly, because of the graft iv put into the last shop. Im very comfortable at the mo with the life i have, but me living life in the fast lane forgot to get a pension.So now im thinking by opening a private hairdressing school, the only one around for the region im in and the nearest one is 50 mile away its a winner, i can buy some property eventually and that would be the pension.The skills i have to offer are second to none, i won hairdresser of the year at colledge when i was 16. im a qualified teacher of hair and beauty, and i won international awards also in france england and italy.
So there you have it although im detoxing the brain on a physical level i am also poluting the mind with dreams and fears and highs and lows. What the hell is wrong with me what kinda animal am i ? am i human or am i searching for something that needs to be found inside the soul? Will i ever be satisfied, probably not . I will be still screaming from the graveyard youve put me in the wrong place.Will i ever settle. Please if there is a fortune teller out there let me know the answer. The angels are giving me a sign.The white feathers are appearing all over the place.I need to dream and i need an answer thanks for reading my garbage tonight folks. xxxxxxx
BEAUTIFUL WOMEN
A little boy asked his mother,"Why are you always crying?"
Because "im a woman" she told him
"I dont understand' he said
His mum just hugged him and said"and you never will"
Later the little boy asked his father"Why does mother seem to cry for no reason"
"All women cry for no reason'was all his dad could say.
The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry,
Fianlly he put a call into god: and when god answered he asked"Why do women cry so easily"?
GOD SAID
"When imade woman,she had to be special.I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world: yet gently enough to give comfort.I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times come form her children.I gave her hardness that allows her to keep going when eveyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.I gave her sensativity to love her children under any circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart. I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfaltering.And finally ,i gave her a tear to shed: this is hers exclusively to use whenever it needed.
You see The beauty of women is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of women must be seen in her eyes,because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where her love resides.EVERY WOMAN IS BEAUTIFUL>
As it was ladys day on saturday, a friend of mine rounded up a table for 10 at the Marriot hotel, for a fun day to help terminally ill childrens make a wish come true.
It was an early start at 12.30 am ,the dress was smart casual, and the days events were, a champers reception and 250 women chatting, it did sound like a lot of cackling hens in one room,the mood was great.After an hour of being topped up by Alexander the great the young foriegn guy with the bottle, we were ushered to our seats.
The day unfolded with a little talk on the wishes.Basically ,we paid 80 euros and to make a wish come true for a terminally ill child.This would be anything from a holiday, swimming with dolphins,meeting your fauvorite football star e.c.t.It was quite emotional too.
Then a 4 course dinner was served, that was gorgeous, a salmon starter, with a unusual chicken dish followed by white chocolate mousse, and wine. A fashon show was next with all the up and coming young irish designers . Then the charity auction, they hired a proffesional cattle auctioneer, he was fab,he had a spoon in his hand instead of a hammer, there was quite a few influential ladies there, bidding started at 200 and went up to over a thousand. The charity were auctioning anything from pictures, to a signed irish rugby shirt, which was sold on our table for 500 euros. We managed to raise 5000 all in all so we were delighted.
Of course linzi couldnt go home at 5 o clock ,as the hubby said i would be first in and last out as normal, so we headed down the town, as the local hired a singer, i sat with a local guy Elvis, yes he does favour him, and i danced the night away to the wee hours. Yes i was dying the following day, yesterday ,but the cause was well worth it.
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14 Posts dating from March 2008
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