Pain, Physical & Emotional

What is it about being ill that makes you so depressed, or even more depressed. And then there is the fact that depression can make you ill. Pain, same thing, more depressed, and depression more pain.

Frankly I'm sick, no pun intended, and tired of these circles. I may have mentioned that I live with pain day in and day out, with difficulty finding pain medicines that help or that I'm not allergic to, well I was given prescriptions for two new ones on Friday, have had a migraine all weekend and haven't been able to try either. Why you might ask, others will say, “Ha!” knowing the reason. It is very simple I can't take any new medicine without someone, preferably a nurse, being here. So I have to wait until tomorrow to try one of the meds and Thursday to try the other. Think about it, if I take both at once and I have a reaction I won't know which I'm having the reaction to and which I can take, if either.

The part that makes saddest is that one of the medicines is specifically for migraines, and I really wanted to take it today, and yesterday, and the day before, but couldn't. No one here long enough. But thankfully tomorrow is the day the nurse comes, and one of my aides will be here, but I'm not sure when. So I can try whichever I need the most. Hopefully the migraine will be gone and done with.

All right enough of that, I also want to write about a friend of mine, I only know her through the internet but she's become quite a friend nonetheless. Her name is Lori and she is a greyhound person, as am I, in case you didn't know that. She has, no had, at least two greyhounds, one Magic and another Muffin. Muffin was 15 years old and a very special girl. A blue brindle, with an almost white face, dainty feet and lovely eyes, I just saw the pictures today.

What makes me sad and angry is that Muffin died this weekend and Lori is grief stricken, who wouldn't be? She had to help Muffin to cross to the rainbow bridge (If you don't know look it up), and that is saddest still. None of us want to help our animals die, but unfortunately many of us have that terrible decision to make and the terrible task to help the animal cross over to a much nicer place. This is the final act of love we can give our beloved pets, but it does not make it easier for any of us. And those of us who believe in an afterlife want to know if our treasured pets will be with us. Greyhound lovers and owners seem to be the most fervent believers in the fact that our hounds will be waiting for us when we die and cross the rainbow bridge, they will be waiting just this side of it, happy, healthy, free, and full of joy, watching for us to join them and cross the bridge together. Some of us will have quite a parade of animals waiting for us, but they will be there, at least that is what I believe. If they aren't going to be there, I'm with Will Rogers, send me where they go.

I can't imagine dying and not finding the animals I loved there, waiting for me. Someone said that animals don't have souls, and all I can say is bull! Have you ever looked into a rescued dogs eyes and seen the trust and joy there when he or she realizes that their problems are over, that they now have a home with love, food and security, where they can live out their lives with a person they can love? If you haven't you wouldn't understand. But when I look into my dog's eyes I see the love there, I see the knowledge that their lives are better now than before they were rescued and I see a peace that so few humans achieve.

I got a little of track there, I was talking about Lori and Muffin. I first got in touch with Lori through some greyhound groups, and then when the scare of chicken jerky being made in China hit, Lori wrote me, knowing that I make dog treats. She asked if I made jerky. I said of course, which might have been stretching it a bit. She wanted low sodium, healthy and good tasting jerky for her Princess Muffin who was aging and refused to eat anything except chicken jerky. So I started to work on a recipe and came up with one that both my hounds liked, shipped a pound of the Muffin and waited. It worked, Muffin loved the jerky, healthy, low sodium and all, she wouldn't eat anything else, and when they ran out Muffin was frantic, so I'd hurry the next shipment as fast as I could, which sometimes took several days if I had to make a batch. Now I won't have to make Muffin's Meaty Chicken Jerky Morsels for Muffin anymore and that makes me very sad indeed. Little Miss Muffin inspired me to make a wonderful new treat for dogs and now she's gone, and I'm not going to get to meet her and Lori isn't going to have to order any more jerky for her Princess. This is such a sad weekend. It goes with my headache, misery loves company I guess.

I suspect this has been a disjointed rant, with little ranting involved but I got these things off my chest and that counts I suspect. I'll rant more later. Fact is there are so many things I want to rant about I'm having trouble getting started.

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